Recently on Instagram I discussed a feeling that can only be described as “ennui”. Simply stated it’s French for a state of restless boredom, but it’s a little more complex than that.
It’s kind of a melange of feelings that as Blanche Devereaux, my favorite character from Golden Girls would say, is a bunch of emotions tumbling around and over each other, none of which feel good. You kind of feel like you want a vacation, a good meal, a good drink, a massage, an adventure and some good love… Blanche describes it as feeling “magenta”. She hates the color magenta and I hate being under a pile of frustrating feelings. What I found is that I wasn’t alone. Others could relate to experiencing a state of inner conflict wrapped up in boredom. But what do you do about it?
I’m working on clearing out some negative emotions. I had to be honest with myself and admit that I’m angry about a few things. I’m figuring out how to create an emotional detox and am going to begin a regular meditation practice for starters. I’ve also been trying to figure out what would make life more interesting.
What brings me joy? What excites me? These are some questions I’m asking myself to pinpoint some areas I can enhance with more enjoyable experiences. In addition to identifying experiences that make me happy, I also want to make more money.
I want to do more for myself like travel and that takes coins. So I’m beefing up my income strategy to increase the bottom line. Deciding to make more money sometimes requires taking stock of your skills and what you have to offer. Deciding to find ways to make more money can also be an exercise in self-appreciation. Along with creating more revenue streams, I’m taking some small social risks and being more spontaneous.
A colleague invited me to a storytelling event at the last minute. Normally I’d be in for the night but I decided to venture out. It was a very interesting evening with some great tales about life that allowed me to put my personal issues on the back burner. It provided some emotional relief. I also met a woman in the mall and we exchanged information to go to a movie some time. I’ve never done that before but decided to take the risk of getting to know someone new-something that isn’t always easy.
These are just a few steps I’m taking to address a mess of feelings and longing for something more. We don’t always know that “more” is, we just know it’s something or somewhere beyond our current circumstances.
If you’re experiencing “ennui”, what are you doing to create more balanced feelings and maybe more excitement in your life?