We’re well into 2020, and many are still (hopefully) working on their new year goals. As we pursue our ambitions have we given thought to the support and tools we’ll need to be successful? In my own journey to create the changes I’d like to see in my life, I decided not to go it alone. I found some ways to get as much support and assistance as possible. A former therapist of mine referred to this behavior as “putting legs under the table”.

I want to create more contentment and wellbeing in my life. I made some decisions, some were harder than others. But I was determined to create as much enjoyment and peace in my life as possible. Some of this entailed re-discovering experiences I once enjoyed but had fallen by the wayside. I decided to be more intentional about getting what I want in life, and recapture parts of myself that had slipped away over time. I sought support in the forms of resources and community.

Writing Group

At one point in my life I really wanted to write a book. I started one but didn’t finish. And since then I continue to daydream and picture myself as a published author and what that life could be like. So finally, I started again. To give myself some support I joined a writing group. I like it so far. I like having a designated time to write with other people who share the same goals. The organizer is really nice and makes an effort to make everyone feel welcomed. I really appreciate that. I feel welcomed and supported there.

Move More

I wanted to focus more on my health, so I joined the gym…again. I used to workout regularly and since stopping have noticed issues with my back, flexibility and of course, my weight. And when I relied on public transportation walking was built into my lifestyle. It was much easier to be and remain active. I thought about going back to the gym for a long time because I wasn’t sure if I was a gym person anymore. And guess what? I’m not. I hate it. Hate. It. But I won’t work out at home so I figured that was my only choice. 

I’ve had to reframe my workouts and look at them as opportunities to move more, opportunities to be grateful for what my body can do. To make going to the gym easier on me I go on days at times I think it will be less crowded. I joined the YMCA, so I also try different locations, feeling out the best fit. So far, it’s worked pretty well and I even discovered some group exercise classes actually look forward to. I really like one of my instructors and am beginning to feel part of a community with the regular class attendees. This helps me remain committed to exercise.


I wanted to work on my flexibility and also find therapeutic spaces to unwind. I found a good deal on a 30-day yoga pass. I really only like restorative yoga because frankly, you don’t do much. You go into different positions and rest, and meditate. It can be very relaxing and a way to calm down your mind and breathe. I’ve also gone to gong bath classes, where someone hits a gong while you meditate and breathe. It takes a bit to get used to but it was a good, new experience. I haven’t enjoyed being the only person of color every time I’ve gone but I try and focus on what yoga is doing for my body and how it’s helping me meet goals. 

Asking For Support

I decided not to handle everything myself and ask for help or a sounding board. I’ve become more vulnerable with people I respect and share challenges in my life trusting that those I’ve turned to have lived enough to understand. This was kind of scary because it entails risk. But I’ve been met with compassion and effective direction. It’s been nice to feel as if I don’t have to figure out everything on my own.

So those are my legs under my table. Those are some of the things I’m doing to provide myself with additional support and resources to meet my goals. What are you doing to bring more of what you want into your life and to get the support you need?

Wishing you all the best in 2020!

Post Author: Carbon

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